I have always been a very independent and stubborn person. Like I would rather chew my own arm off then ask for help or how to do something let alone ask for directions. But since I have moved to this charming village people keep offering to help. And of course following my basic instincts I very politely mumble no no its okay but thank you anyway. A few weeks back my neighbor Bob offered to mow my lawn and I said oh Bob thank you so much but I got it don’t worry. The other day while I was staging an embarrassing about of trash bags Joanne from across the street asked me if I needed help and of course I said no no they are light dont worry. But then she brought out her sons husky puppy and I had to go over for kisses. And she said to me we all help each other here whatever you need just ask whether its help with boxes or with your machines just ask. And again oh okay thanks. Well a week or so ago the envy of the neighborhood the john deere tractor wont start. So my grass in the front yard was getting to the point where it looked like hay and I kept trying to start the mower to no avail getting more and more embarrassed as the days passed.
Yesterday was a frustrating day I can’t till deep enough because of all the rain to get my vegetable garden in which makes me crazy. But I just needed to take a deep breath and tell myself that it will get in when it gets in you aren’t going to market so it doesn’t matter. Then I tried to start the mower again with fresh gas and still no go. So we went down to the local for lunch which I just love. I am thinking of just giving them a portion of each pay check and stop cooking all together. I jest (no not really). But with my husband and his brain issues sometimes when we go out its like this charade of pretending everything is normal when it couldn’t be farther if we tried. He looks a little nuts and then cant really hold too much of a conversation so I end up babbling for a while before giving up. The enormity of the situation hits and I realize just how far from normal things are. I posted a picture on facebook of Tommy sitting with his back to me just something he does its nothing personal.
But my friend must have seen this for the call for help it was and starting talking to me on messenger and I told her how wonderful it was here and how people keep offering to help. She then very wisely said when you need help you need to take it just think about how happy it makes others to help. So I grumbled I don’t do that and she said well you need to start you can’t do everything the way things are and you need to accept help when offered. So between yesterday and today I was mulling this over and said fine I will ask for help next time I see Bob.
I walked down to the farmers market which is one of the perks to living so close I can get a little exercise while fixing my need for good bread eggs and bacon and I also wanted to reconnect with a friend who vends there who I havent seen all winter okay and his really really cute border collie samson who gave me a big kiss and kept wanted me to toss him twigs. Oh so cute. On my way back as luck would have it there was Bob mowing and I screwed up all my courage and walked up and said hey bob remember a few weeks ago when you offered to mow for me? Well could you mow my front yard my mower wont start. And of course his eyes lit up and he said of course. He said I will do the front now but what about the back and I said no no don’t worry about the back and he gave me the look and I said fine do the back too.
So Bob starts on the front and I smile relieved that my yard will no longer be an eye sore. A few minutes later I look out and John from across the street has joined in with a weed whacker. At this point I stand in the front door and tears start to roll I mean how nice is this people just join in to get things done are you serious? I can’t not help so I grab a rake and start raking the grass into piles and Matt from down the street rolls up on his 4 wheeler and trailer and says can I have the grass for my garden and proceeds to haul it all away. So now I have three guys helping me what a place this is. I was just blown away. Then Bob started to clean up the side yard and get rid off the fall leaves so I went over to help and I said my friend suggested yesterday that I accept offers of help when needed and he said I am glad you did we all help each other around here but I could tell you were a stubborn girl. And I laughed yup a stubborn girl but one who is just maybe learning to let down her guard an accept help when needed. I maybe havent always made the best decisions in life but moving here was one of the best ones ever.